What If It Was For Me?

Late yesterday afternoon as I was playing the piano, I heard a big vehicle coming up our street. Turns out it was a limo! The driver went past the house, into the intersection, then made a three point turn and headed slowly back past my windows. The front passenger was obviously looking for a house number and for a moment I thought "what if it is for me?". Then the thought hit that who would be sending a limo for me? Dad? Why would he send one, he's not even in this country. So the fantasy passed but it made me wonder. . . who was that big car for, where were they going, who sent it to them. . . Fun thoughts to entertain when you're by yourself, alone.

I was going through my desk trying to find something and came across a folder of OLD funnies from the last 15(?) years of e-mail. Some of it was soooo funny that I had to post it:

Things we wish our dogs would try and remember:

1. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's undies when he's on the toilet

2. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff

3. I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it

4. "Kitty Roca" is not a food group

5. I will not roll on dead birds, worms, etc

6. The sofa is not a face towel, neither is Mom's lap

7. I will not steal sandwiches off the counter while they are being made

8. I will not steal bowls of cereal

9. I will not eat gardening gloves and then redeposit them in the yard after processing

10. I will not sleep on the couch

11. I will not get on the bed uninvited

12. I will not eat lawn furniture, hot tub tops, hot pads, watering cans or wind chimes

13. My head does not belong in the fridge

14. I will not bark in the car

And so it goes, and so it goes, and I'm the only one who knows. . .

You get the picture.

Just a thought

When I read blogs about families, or from people with children, I can't help but think: Whose side are you preparing you children to fight with? The final battle is going on, and there will be no fence sitters, with which side will you stand? Don't think it's real? Read the papers, watch the news, open you eyes - we know who the winner will be, it's the test that counts.

Maybe We Could Just Be Nice?

In the past couple of weeks I have had to wait in line at the post office three different times. I usually use the automated kiosk in the lobby, but these were international packages, and you have to have the clerk do his thing with the customs declaration. All three times I had to wait, I was at least number 15 in line. At first there were two clerks, then just one, waiting on all those people. Two of the times I was there, people have become irate about having to wait. Granted, it is not a real exciting place to be, and you really don't want to get into a big discussion with a stranger, BUT come on people - we are all in the same boat and making rude comments about the clerk, the service, the government in general, etc., etc., does NOT help the wait go any faster. It just makes you look (sound) like an idiot.
The first time I had to wait, a woman started ranting about how she had a meeting she had to get to at 3p.m., it was about 12:30 p.m. at the time. People tried to ignore her, but she escalated and was starting to get histerical. She let everyone know in a loud voice how she had to get home to let her bulldogs out for a potty break, get some lunch and get back to work. "What is wrong with these people" she kept saying. . .isn't there someone else back there who could help ME?!? The clerk explained that all the people were working, but that didn't stop this woman. She ranted and raved and then it was her turn. She was there to pick up a certified letter, and the old guy clerk made a big show of looking through the front cubbys, then said maybe it was in the back. HA He took about 8 minutes looking around or having a coffee break, but in general giving some payback. What a hoot! When he finally came back out, he looked in the cubby again and amazingly - FOUND HER LETTER. As she was leaving, not in the least repentant, several people commented that maybe she should have been nice, it might have cut down her wait.
Today, same type of situation. But this time two older men (older enough to know better), got mouthy. The clerk was by herself, and everybody needed something. These men got louder and louder so a supervisor came to see what was going on. They started on him! He shook his head and went back to his job. Eventually the same old guy clerk from above, came on shift. The line had been moving, but these old guys just kept up the derogotory comments. Finally they had their turn and moved on. I thanked the clerk for his patience and calm in the midst of annoying people. He said it was just part of the job. After witnessing these displays I can totally
understand "going postal".

The Puma on the Bed

When we came in this morning, mom said she was going back to bed for awhile. I love it when that happens, because as it happens, I have quit listening to mom. She said "No dogs upstairs!", but when she crawled back under the covers, I was on top of things. Really on top of things. (It's a good thing the comforter matches my hair, she doesn't get as mad if she can't see the hair.). Well, then that other dog started barking, and wanting to come up on the bed too, but I went into protective Puma mode, and bounced around the bed, looking over the edge, growling, snapping, and just being my great protecter self. And when the evil things under the covers tried to shove me off the end of the bed, I did what any protecter dog would do, and bit them.

We went back outside then, it was very cold. Mom did let us back in later - she said "I hope you have learned your lesson.". It's too bad I can't remember what she was talking about.

My Day Wins

I just read Holly's blog and then Aiden's blog and, yes, that was a tough day. BUT I WIN!!!!! I woke up feeling achy, had to go return a skirt at the mall, pick up the lights for over the bar, and go to WalMart. Not a good idea when you don't feel all that spiffy and things seem surreal - like the light is either hyper- bright and your brain is sort of spacy - and then you get in line behind a couple and make the mistake of looking at the back of them. Yeah, I looked at the back of this very tall, very large,black woman, wearing black jeans a hot pink top and yes, you're right, a HOT PINK THONG!!!!! All I can really see is the pink elastic and the disappearing pink fabric, and then my eyes burned out. One of my last thoughts was - Who knew they came in pink and that size.

Other than that the day was great.

I mentioned to Dad at 3 a.m. that his dog likes to poop on the glacier in the back yard. Who knew that was so funny? I mean scooping frozen poo is better than any other kind, but when you have to climb the glacier to get to it, it stops being a job and turns into a JOB. I have not fallen on the icy sidewalk or driveway thus far this year, and hope to be able to maintain that record - however, I do not wish to take a fall on the glacier amid frozen dog doo. I'm just saying...

Manatees Rule

I was watching the news last night and at the Portland OR Zoo the orangatans are given tee shirts from both teams playing in the Super Bowl. Apparantly in the last 4 years the oran's have chosen the correct team, so I was rooting for AZ to win this year because I figured I'd vote with the primates. Valerie saw something about Manatees' making the choice so she was voting for Pittsburgh. It was a close game, right down to the last one minute, and the Manatees take the day. Oh well, what do primates know anyway? The best part is the commercials anyway. Go to hulu.com or NBC.com to watch them - some of them were REALLY FUNNY.